A Compelling Story
Carolyn: The Silent Secret is a story of extreme bravery and fortitude. Carolyn's fight to survive is an inspiration to all victims of domestic violence.
Many domestic violence advocacy organizations, like McHenry County Turning Point, work to give victims of domestic violence options that permit them to leave violent situations – enabling them to end dangerous situations like the one Carolyn lived with for so many years.
Link to YouTube Video
We Never Suspected
"If you suspect something, then you start looking for clues, but if you don’t suspect something, you are not looking for clues and neither one of us suspected anything."
- Jim and Beth Wester,
"So then there is the verbal abuse. Then it becomes name-calling…it becomes insults…there’s a pinch that becomes a push and then a punch."
- Carolyn Cox,
"Women who were abused did not talk about it. It was a household matter that was kept secret. Divorces did not happen."
- Nichole Owens,
The Silent Secret
"So over the years, you go on. You make things work. Your children get older. You get involved in homework and all their school activities and you do not stop to think you are exhausted from making all this happen and every so often, there is a black eye or your head is being held to the floor or against the wall saying I will not tolerate this or that from you anymore."
- Carolyn Cox,
"I am moving on with my life and I want to give hope to others that they can do the same. All abuse victims…we need to keep on going. We need to quit walking on eggshells and we need to put on our shoes and become our own person. We cannot mislead ourselves into going back into relationships for our children or whatever excuse we come up with."
Carolyn Cox, Domestic Violence Survivor
Carolyn's Darkest Hour
A Will to Survive
Carolyn lived 40 years of her life as a victim of domestic violence…. Until she nearly became one of the fatalities of domestic violence.
Carolyn’s story is one of extreme bravery and fortitude. Her fight to survive is an inspiration to all victims of domestic violence.
Carolyn now travels the country talking to groups to warn others about the dangers of ignoring the silent secret of domestic violence.
The Message Continues
The Messages Continues
"I just would like for women, like me, to realize that you can get beyond it. It’s tough, but you need to take that step...I don’t think they are blossoming or growing when they are under or stifled to that extent. I don’t think the children are either. I am sorry…I am pained because I think my children lost their childhood. I thought I was staying in it for them to take care of them, but I think in the long run, they really lost so much of their life."
- Carolyn Cox,
We Have the Power to Stop Domestic Violence
"We have the power to stop domestic violence. We have to say violence is never okay. We can do that in our community…in our neighborhoods, county, state, nation and internationally. We can stop domestic violence."
Jane Farmer, Executive Director of Turning Point - Woodstock, Illinois
Join with us to stop domestic violence! Download a pdf version of this poster, Carolyn: The Silent Secret and help spread the word.
Prosecuting the Case
"A part of me was fearful for her that they would come back not guilty because it could happen in any case.
Nichole Owens, Chief of the Criminal Division in McHenry County, Illinois
The Ultimate Betrayal
"I was so grief stricken…so betrayed…I could not understand…43 years I was married to him and then he would do something like that to me?"
"…one of our rights here in America is to choose our lawyer, with exception;